We are nearing the end of summer and with it my freedom. I live for summer. I live for everything that summer stands for. It used to be that I loved the school year. Not too many years ago I actually begged for school to start. Either I have become a better mother and have figured out how to get my kids to get along better or I have become more tolerant of their fighting. Either way I just don't feel motivated anymore for the year to start again.
Really, it isn't the children fighting or the lack there of, it is the looming responsibility that I dread. Now that I have older children there is so much more responsibility than there used to be. So many late nights, so many early mornings, so much stress, and quite a few tears as well. People say that you never stop being a parent. I have thought about that a lot in regards to my life., and I can see the wisdom in what they say. My kids are old enough now that they do their own homework. They rarely need my help but I still stress about them. I still worry about their projects, their grades, their decisions, and their worries.
I was talking to a friend yesterday who was having a hard time with her little ones. She currently only has 2 children ages 1 and 3. I reflected on how quickly that time has gone by for me. It was only yesterday that I only had 2 little ones ages 1 and 3. This time in her life is rough, and at this stage you rarely see the fruits of your labor so to speak. I am now experiencing the beginning of the fruits of my labor. My older children have become beautiful young men and women who I am so often proud of. They work hard to choose integrity and righteousness. I know people (including me) say to appreciate all these moments while your kids are young but the reality is that there are so many hard days when appreciating the moments is harder than it sounds. Trust me though, the day will come when you really will see your hard work manifested in your children's souls.
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