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Freedom and The Process of Grieving

The other day I told Mark that he had to swear to me that if in the case of a sudden death he would come back in his spirit form and say good-bye to me. Ok, so the probability of that happening is slim and yet, I would think that many people who have lost loved ones have wished so many times for one more good bye to say the things they wish they would have said. I have thought about that a lot with the passing of my friend Linda.

I have also thought today, with the celebration of our nation and all of the brave men and women that are serving our country, about the many people who die in battle never having a chance to say the things they wish they would have said. I believe in life after death. I know that our loved ones pass on to the next life and do the Lord's work. I also believe that our loved ones are guardian angels among us. I have reflected often on those who do not believe in life after death and I don't know how I could cope with someone I loved dying if I did not believe with every fiber of my being that I would see them again one day.

I am grateful to all the men and women serving to preserve our freedoms that we enjoy by living in this free nation of ours. How blessed we are to worship as we choose. How blessed we are to have such inspired governing documents such as the Constitution. I choke up every time I sing religious freedom songs, and my heart swells with pride every time I drive down main street and see our nation's flag staked along the sidewalk on both sides of the street flying in representation of all that we have been so blessed to have been protected for. There are so many who have lost their lives for us and I am truly humbled at the staggering numbers.

I know the Lord loves each of us though and even though I can't talk to Linda again, and so many people across the world can't talk to their loved ones that have passed on again, the Lord still watches over us and can fill our hearts with peace and love if we will turn to him. I have had that peace as of late and testify that it does come.

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So in my typical fashion, I put a plan into action and then immediately have to deal with the changing of said plan. I went to bed dizzy last night hoping it was nothing and that it would pass as I slept. No such luck, this morning I got up and didn't stay up. So, three movies later I sit here on the couch with the best laid plans laid to rest. I was going to get up early, make breakfast, get dressed before 10, and send my honey off with a kiss and looks of devotion. Instead...Mark got up and I slept in, finally got up in time to stumble down the stairs, see the first set of kids off to school, and plant myself on the couch for the rest of the day. Mark gave me a kiss on his way out the door and instead of looks of devotion I had eyes welling with tears. Great day huh? Luckily I don't have any plans for today. Tomorrow isn't too bad, I don't have many responsibilities, but Friday I have an important photo shoot. This dizzy thing better go away!!!